Buttress - Brutus

 Opinionated Writing 

When listening to the music video, the first thing I felt was dread about whatever was happening; the music and the visuals further added onto this emotion. The lyrics portray envy, jealousy, hatred, and the contradiction of wanting to be him despite hating him. Here Brutus feels like a hypocrite cause she hates and despises Caesar, but at the same time wants to be him. I feel as though Brutus is confused with herself because he hates and wishes death upon Caesar at the same time, he thinks he is beautiful and has a pure and noble heart. The lyrics and the visuals also feel like Brutus is not only trapped in her own mind, which is filled with envy and jealousy, but also in the opinions of people around her. Here the Brutus is shown as a women making me question for a second if Brutus was really a women, her need to prove herself and the desire to be a poet and not just a mere muse shows that she is not taken seriously nor what she creates; it perceives like all her effort is not just enough because she is a woman and nothing else. She observes that even her mother wishes she were a man. Here, the confusion on what she is feeling, what drives her, what is her intent, what she must be, what is expected of her is so palpable that we can feel it in our bones. As though in a daze that is fed by hatred, envy, jealousy, appreciation, love, and desire to prove herself, she is heading to stab him, and the people surrounding her are chanting her name as though to provoke her more and push her to a state where she is unstable and making her think she is right to murder someone. When she stabs him, her sense of self is still lost, as though she lost herself when she said she would become him by killing him. It also felt like she was in a dream-like state, where she may or may not regret her actions after the feeling passes. It felt as though the person involved is under the influence and was not in their right mind to make any decisions. As soon as i was done watching and listening to the music video, the first thing that came to my mind was the movie "Penguin", it was though she wanted to prove to herself that she can be him and convince herself that she does not want harm upon him. Still, it only comes from an intent that god will strike her if she does something to him. In the end, she does not even want to be herself anymore, but a person named Rex. It appears that even as she is basking in the euphoric feeling of killing her enemy, she knows that she can't be him or herself anymore, thus changing her name to Rex.